tawa muna

Q. Why do couples hold hands during weddings?
A. It is just a formality. Like 2 boxers, they shake hands before the fight begins.

Pulis: Bakit mo inihagis ang bata sa bintana?
Yaya: Sinunod ko lang po ang utos ng amo ko.
Sabi po ng amo ko, 'wala na tayong Pampers, i- Huggies mo na lang si baby.

What is the most impressive example of Tolerance?
Ah! Golden Wedding Anniversary!

Applicants
2 girls nag-aaply ng work. 1 matalino, 1 bobo
Matalino: Buti ka pa natanggap. Ano ba ginawa mo?
Bobo: Wala. Nung nag-fill up me ng form, nilagay ko sa sex, sure.

Teacher: Write a short story in a few words discussing Religion, Sexuality and Mystery.
Student wrote: "My God! I'm pregnant. I wonder who the father is?"

Sensitive Child
1st day in school...
Mom to teacher - Very sensitive po ang anak ko. Kung kailangan nyo po parusahan, sampalin nyo na lang po ang katabi nya. Matatakot na 'yan!

Love and Marriage Cycle
1-2 yrs : magkasalo sa plato
3-5 yrs : tig-isang plato
5-7 yrs : nagbabatuhan na ng plato
8-10 yrs : wala na silang plato
That is what we call PLATOnic love!

3 brothers named Bu, Chu and Fu migrated to USA from China.
They decided to change their name :
Bu became Buck
Chu became Chuck.
Fu decided to go back to China

Man : I want to divorce my wife. She hasn't spoken to me i n 6 months.
Lawyer: Better think it over. Wives like that are very hard to find!

Do you know why bra makers measure cup size
by "A B C D E F "?
A - almost gone
B - barelly noticeable
C - comfortable
D - damn good
E - exremely big and
F - Fake

Learning French
City - ce vou
Drug - sha vou
Good bye - va vou
Bald - cal vou
Caught in the act - navo cou
Feathers - valahi vou
Not clear - mala vou
Cute - a cou

Chalk
Amo : 'Day, ang chalk na ito para mamatay ang
ipis. Gamitin mo sa pader.
Maid : Opo, ati.
Next day ......
Nagulat ang amo, nakasulat sa pader...
"Epes mamatay kayong lahat!"

Katapusan
Lumindol ng malakas noon....
Nagkagulo and lahat ay nag-panic.
Sumigaw ang isang lalake..
"Katapusan na! Katapusan na!"
Sumagot ang isa pang lalake..
"Tanga, a kinse pa lang."

Tawa pud mo oi! :P